Formely Known As...

Hello, my name is Lolita, Lola or something equally as exotic and sexy. I used to go by a different name, perhaps you remember me? My face probably looks a bit familiar...perhaps a shower and some make-up has transformed me into someone you almost don't recognize. "Have we met somewhere before?" you ask. Yes, of course we have. The last time you saw me I was sporting flour on my nose rather than this glamorous coat of hollywood sparkle, my fingernails were broken, with Amy Winehouse hair, my legs needed shaved, there was Crisco between my fingers, my toenail polish chipped and my perfume was an enticing blend of sugar, vanilla and baby slobber. Sounding familiar? Yes, that's right. It's me. Mommy. Or rather the artist formerly known as Mommy. I was going to change my name to this "~" but I couldn't pronounce it.

What posessed me to change my name you ask? Hearing "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!" 50 freakin' thousand times a day.... and it's spoken like some diatribe...some punishment for being present. Rarely is it spoken with love or tenderness, but rather a shrill, shreaking, urgent, demand!! It doesn't stop until you drop everything and respond, with full attention, verbal and visual. So I have decided to change my name. Today I will only answer to Lola...and I'm going to try and get the Crisco cleaned up.

Ha! Anyone who has ever called my house knows exactly what I am talking about....there is a reason my friends only seem to be able to keep up with me here...online...pathetic. Do I ever blog about good days anymore??? Maybe I am the one who is pathetic!!